Part 1

Table of Contents:

The Movie
The Premise
The Characters
Special Effects
Conclusion

Some time ago, I think a month or two before the final week was released, RedMaverickZero asked me to review the entire season of OHR House: Heroes at its completion. I said, “Sure,” thinking that I could somehow find a way to review a three-hour OHR movie, and, even more miraculously, find a way to make the review worth reading without ruining the game’s charm. Deep down, I had no idea how I was supposed to do this.

It was, after all, like a movie, a non-interactive, yet highly visual, super long cut scene. No gameplay involved. And, the only way to review an OHR movie without wrecking it was to review it as one would review a real movie.

Or, at least that’s how it was until RMZ sprung a surprise ending on us, an ending that, contrary to anyone’s expectation, involved gameplay. Yes, he rewarded the dedicated viewers with a handful of new games (along with some additional content), and turned what should’ve been a straightforward “television” series into a box set of special features. And, despite my apprehension in reviewing this non-interactive game, his sudden inclusion of bonus content made the job more interesting to me.

So now here we are, reading the result of this humble request and subsequent apprehension.

Because reviewing everything in one article would be daunting, however, I’m splitting this review into two parts. This month we’ll discuss the movie portion. Next month we’ll talk about the bonus content. The month after that we probably won’t talk about anything, and you’ll thank me because this review is already too long.


The Movie:

Now, let me come right out and say that discussing the plot of this movie, show, whatever would be unfair. The whole reason why RMZ made it was so that people in the OHR community would have something to enjoy. He didn’t scrape the bottom of the barrel for ideas, nor did he slap something together with three cans and a roll of duct tape and call it an experience. He sat down, drew a multitude of animations and set pieces, wrote at least a hundred boxes of dialogue, imported numerous sound effects and songs, drew many, many portraits, painstakingly formed everything into a cohesive, visual story, and then waited, sometimes on edge, for the viewers of OHR land to vote on who stayed and who went, and then did it all over again for the following week. And, he did this for eight core episodes. And, he did this knowing that one of his planned story lines could take a dive at any wrong turn in the votes. And, he never slacked on any of them (at least not in quality—release dates were another story). And to spoil the story here, when watching the show is all the player can do until the bonus content is unlocked, would defeat the purpose of playing it, and ultimately, would make all that hard work pointless.

So I won’t discuss the plot.

What I’ll do instead, at least for now, is to discuss the premise and the characters. I feel like that’ll give new viewers some inside information about how to appreciate the game without having every cool detail spoiled.

However, if anyone feels like he or she needs story details, I will be posting an episode guide along with Part 2 next month.

The Premise:


OHR House: Heroes comes from two sources: OHR House by JSH357 and OHR World by RMZ, neither of which I’ll discuss in-depth in this section (though OHR World may make a bigger appearance in the second half of this review). OHR House adopts the typical reality show format of lumping nine people together in the same house and expecting them to live with each other, tolerate their habits, and eventually vote each other out each week. The twist with OHR House is that the people are members of the OHR community, which I suppose isn’t much of a twist in reality, but it does make a handful of us feel special. OHR World does the same thing as OHR House, but with fewer contestants and a far more limited demographic—the characters come from RMZ’s lineup of games.

OHR House: Heroes takes the same concept of reality television applied to the OHR, but does so using popular heroes from OHR games, rather than popular members of the community or characters belonging to a single author’s body of work, and begs the viewer to vote off his least favorite between two contenders or more, depending on the week’s needs, for the chopping block. And, for the casual viewer stuck in a reality-drenched environment, this would seem like an unnecessary exercise in punishment. But RMZ was smart about this. The “reality” is only part of the show.

As it turns out, there is a battle between good and evil happening within this production, and the heroes are stuck in the middle. And though they have a reality show to deal with, along with all its red tape, they cannot succumb to their MTV-style petty bickering because someone or something is trying to drive them out of the house, and they have to figure out who, why, and what to do if the opponents succeed. And this is what makes the show unique to every typical reality series out there. It isn’t just about who’s sleeping with who (which is fortunate considering the cast); it’s about becoming heroes.


The Characters:

As it should be of no surprise, the characters are what separate OHR House: Heroes from other shows of its type. Without the diverse nature of these people (and things), the story would be nothing but a series of talking heads from a bunch of inanimate robots. And no one would want to watch that.

So, who are these characters who breathe life into this story? Let me give you a quick introduction so you know who they are when you meet them.


In Alphabetical Order:

Note: The author listing will list those who were originally credited for the game. In the case of multiple authors, I’m listing first the people who were claiming the game’s ownership on Castle Paradox. I can only assume that they’re the ones who actually came up with these characters.

The Heroes:

These are the nine that we follow throughout each week. They’re opinionated. They’re crazy. But they sure are lovable (except for maybe the shark guy). The following will acquaint you with this diverse group of heroes if you don’t know them all ready.

Name: Bob the Hamster
Game(s): Wandering Hamster, Bob the Hamster in the Crypt of Baconthulhu, Don’t Eat Soap
Author: James Paige


Everyone in the community knows this guy. He’s the one that we first met when we stumbled upon the OHR at the official Hamster Republic website so many years ago. He’s the one who’d flap his left arm in propeller fashion and crack a one-liner to greet each visitor. He’s the doorman of the Hamster Republic, its star, and the one that we consider the OHR’s mascot. He’s also the biggest hero to come from a decade-long unfinished game (Wandering Hamster) that I know of.

In his games, Bob is adventurous but goofy. He’ll whack a plip with a mallet, munch a carrot in battle, or, most recently, blow a bubble to encapsulate his enemy. No journey is too absurd for this valiant, furry little hero, and he’ll march in to battle without hesitation, even when he’s used as bait.

In OHR House: Heroes, Bob understands that his role in the community has thrust him into a state of fame. Though, he’s one of the few in the house whose adventure is still unfinished, he’s the only one who seems to have universal adoration, and the other house mates know this. For this, there seems to be a dichotomy of trust: On the one hand, the others love him as a hero and legend; on the other, no one understands why fame has turned him into a recluse.

Name: Bob Surlaw
He made his first appearance in 2000, leaving home to storm the Blue Shrine for the first of five crystals in the classic Walthros. And if he were just an ordinary knight, this step into the unknown may not have meant more to the populace than just another trip to Wal-Mart. But Bob Surlaw is not a knight, nor is he ordinary. He’s a wanderer, an adventurer, and a floating fish. Yes, he is one creature in a vast ecology of walking, talking, floating animals who war, who fight, and who eat like primeval man. And his unique world has created enough awe in the game player’s heart to warrant him a place among the OHR legends.

Throughout the last decade, he has appeared in several OHR games including two incarnations of Walthros and its sequel, Surlaw Armageddon. Both games, combined with Village People: The Video Game, Gato Sucio: The Quest for Color, and Totally...Gihern to name a few, formed a master plot involving the collapse of dimensions due to the quest of the five crystals and the endangerment of the Sun Stone. Bob Surlaw, the hero at the center of the plot, has been the key player in preventing the destruction of time and space.

In OHR House: Heroes, his valiant, well-rounded, good-boy charm bows to his enormous appetite, and he makes the other house mates sick. He has no regard for his table manners, nor does he realize he’s missing them. But he does take his role as hero seriously, and he will only enter a skirmish if he can do so honorably, and, well, heroically. He is also the self-proclaimed protector of the plip that sneaks into the house.


Name: Housemaster
Game: Arfenhouse (I-IV)
Author: Misteroo (Parts I-III), Seppel (Part IV)


Every era needs a good clown, and the OHR circa late ‘90s gave us the Housemaster.

Now, Housemaster came from a humble beginning, traveling the vast expanse of his front yard to reach the distant, but attainable front door to the crap-game Mecca called Arfenhouse. On his way across the yard, he employed his electric little sidekick Pikachu, and battled destructive villains like Mah Freend Amy and Evil Kitty. And his journey, while extended, hit rewind and repeat when he set forth on his second and third adventures across the great lawn, through the bowels of Arfenhouse, and beyond.

As time wore on, he simultaneously transcended his original author and the OHR itself, the former in the lengthy adventure called ARFENHOUSE!!!1 FOR!!!!11 DISC 11 (or Arfenhouse 4 for short), the latter a series of flash movies on Newgrounds, and made his name among thousands of new fans. And in that time, he continued to act like a raging maniac who couldn’t speak clearly, or acknowledge the fact that he was a walking, gibbering, piece of toast.

In OHR House: Heroes, Housemaster is the instigator of poor tact, bad timing, dangerous practical jokes, and will say pretty much whatever he’s thinking at the moment. He makes fun of anyone, has no regard for personal restraint, probably smells like moldy bread, and is a subject of disapproval for the majority of the house mates. For someone who considers himself a master of houses, it seems strange that he’s the one that no one wants around the house.


Name: Julia
Game(s): Pitch Black (1-2), OHR Date
Authors: Shadowiii & Mr. B


In 2003, three young adults entered a haunted house. The two guys went in first, daring the girl to follow. The girl wasn’t interested; she didn’t want to fall for their game. But a week passed and the two guys never came out. So, Julia went in to find them.

All she had was a flashlight. And her wits. And a healthy fear of the dark.

She was also one of the rare cases where a female carried the lead in an OHR game.

In OHR House: Heroes, she entered another strange house full of weird characters and became the first token girl contestant to round out the cast. Though she came to the show without any heroic trait other than an ability to travel dark corridors and to state the obvious, she quickly became one of two potential love interests for the angsty guy who disappeared after a week, and thus fulfilled her token role with grace. Subsequently, her experience with said angsty guy, among others in the house, left her with an intense hatred for men. Now she has the required skills needed to join the Ivy League.


Name: Sinister Kikraizer
Game: Trailblazers
Author: Retrogamer


Three potential heroes touch an enchanted map and are whisked away to various lands of evil. And, they do it in 8-bit color. And, they land in worlds of pre-slice, pre-pixel-movement side-scrollers. They are Brinks, Noriko, and Sinister Kikraizer (or S.Kikraizer for short). Little is known about any of them, but rumor has it that they’re taller than most ordinary heroes.

In OHR House: Heroes, S.Kikraizer makes the jump from side-scroller antihero to housemate on the edge. He’s mean. He’s tricky. And, no one should trust him. And it’s no wonder; he left Brinks and Noriko behind—doesn’t even mention them in conversation. In a triangle of disturbing heroes, including S.Kikraizer, Housemaster and, well, Mr.Triangle, the scaly shark-beast called S.Kikraizer stands on the pinnacle. If someone in the house is framed for murder, chances are that S.Kikraizer is the one behind the plot.


Name: Kyle
Game(s): Timestream Saga, Timestream Saga Second Edition, Timestream Saga: Arcadia Incident Report
Author: Fenrir-Lunaris


Every engine must have its staple hero, the cookie-cutter guy with the spiky ponytail and the huge sword. And, that hero must be named Kain. However, in some cases, the hero will endure a name change—also common in RPGs—and Kain will become Kyle. And, while the name that defines the man alters a few letters, the man rarely alters his character, and in the end we have a leader who will stand in the forefront and strike down armies with his nasty, brutal sword.

In OHR House: Heroes, the badass hero of Timestream Saga is reduced to a reserved, almost whiny version of a rock star who has no personality, musical talent, or lady sense. This hero quickly becomes the RPG hero of tradition that no one remembers, because he looks and acts like anyone else one might meet on the street (in RPG land, mind you—the real world would look at him funny), and displays a quality that most would consider forgettable.


Name: Mr.Triangle
Game(s): Mr.Triangle’s S****y Adventure (1-5), Mr.Triangle’s Maze (Madness), Mr.Triangle’s Battle Royal, OHR World
Author: RedMaverickero


The infamous Mr.Triangle began life as the star of five s****y adventures and quickly ballooned to fame as the center of great OHR controversy when a review for the fifth game had gotten way out of hand. And though the dust of review fallout (between the reviewer and a third party who had nothing to do with the game) settled, the name of Mr.Triangle hardly died, as he soon made an appearance in alternative games like Mr.Triangle’s Maze Madness (a game designed in the spirit of the classic Chip’s Challenge) and Mr.Triangle’s Battle Royal, which never really gained any kind of fame.

In each game, Mr.Triangle contends with his arch-nemesis, The Creator, a diabolical man who puts Mr.Triangle through all sorts of fourth-wall hell for his own amusement. And Mr.Triangle, a foul-mouthed shape with feet, travels these sadistic lands anyway, just to shove the Creator’s tricks back in his face.

And, of course, anyone who pays close attention will know that the Creator is none other than RedMaverickZero himself, making for one of the more metaphysical experiences on the OHR.

In OHR House: Heroes, Mr.Triangle makes little distinction between RMZ and the Creator, and goes about his business as a housemate with as much orneriness as a walking shape can manage. His friendships are shaky, and his heroism questionable, but in the end he proves that he’s at least willing to try doing the honorable thing, even when he dons a soul-testing piece of demon armor that he really likes using. Just don’t ask him to be nice.


Name: Neké
Game: Neké: Woman of Mystery
Authors: Sephy99, Lucier, ToxicShroom


During the summer of 2001, things were hot, contests were popular, and a woman undressed for the 168-hour contest. She was an actress, or a spy—perhaps a little of both, because, you know, she knew some kung fu—and someone wanted her dead. But, when the assassin came to her apartment to finish her off, she had to react. She had to run.

The problem? She had just finished undressing for the Jacuzzi when the assassin arrived. Now she had to run around New York all naked like—a girl’s worst nightmare, I’m sure. However, Neké, as classy as a spy/actress can be, slapped a couple black bars over her necessities and slipped into the vast metro to find her would-be killers, and perhaps, kill them back, determined not to let a little thing like public nudity stop her from surviving.

In OHR House: Heroes, she forgets to put her clothes back on. And because of this, she’s quickly regarded as the house’s, er, loosest member. But this doesn’t stop certain noblemen with spiky hair from hitting on her. She also seems to have a short fuse, and doesn’t tolerate sexism. Odd, considering her choice of wardrobe.


Name: Rancher Sam
Game: Sheep Rancher
Author: Moogle1


Perhaps one of the most unlikely heroes to join the cast, Rancher Sam was born during the beginning of the plotscript-heavy, nonRPG heyday of the OHR (2001) and became the star of one of the year’s most celebrated titles. Nowadays, arcade-style games are expected to show on the OHR every few months, but back then, the trend was unheard of. And Sam was the pioneer.

But despite his sudden claim to fame and Jed Clampett hat, status didn’t change the fact that he had work to do, and his work involved creating lightweight blocks to guide his sheep back in to their pen.

In OHR House: Heroes, Rancher Sam is the other honorable soul who doesn’t really want to fight, but is more than happy to spend time watching landscapes and attracting monsters. Out of the entire cast, he is the most reserved member, which is fitting considering his background.


In Nonalphebetical Order:

The Villains:

Every hero has an enemy, and these guys take up that mantle. They’re crass, they’re vile, and they’ll ruin a hero’s world at first chance. But they’re also sensitive creatures when lumped together in their own club, and will fight each other only when one is no longer the center of attention. These are the guys who are trying to run the heroes out of the house, and on the surface, they need therapy.

Name: Cthulhu
Game: Vikings of Midgard
Author: Fenrir-Lunaris


A mysterious creature slips in and out of space, haunting the progression of the brave Vikings of Midgard as they seek to end the world of the threat that threatens their world (read: I forgot the premise of that game). He tries to steal their crystals, he harasses them with “Sp*ckt,” and he tangles their journey as a piece of gum would tangle hair.

He is truly a villain’s villain, and he doesn’t play nice.

In OHR House: Heroes, he tries to sabotage the house with Kothyls, but somehow ends up getting flushed down the toilet.


Name: Vlad the Hamster
Game: Bob the Hamster VGA
Author: James Paige


Some heroes have a flashy villain for an archenemy. Bob the Hamster has a doppleganger named Vlad. For every noble trait that Bob possesses, Vlad does opposite. If Bob wants to smite an enemy with a carrot, Vlad will smite double with a dagger. If Bob hits a baddie with a pie, Vlad will first spit in that pie. He’s a true half-pint monster.

In OHR House: Heroes, this villainous trait continues; though, for an enemy that seems like he should be calling the shots, he sure seems like a background thug. But is he? Hmm....


Name: Slither
Game: Mr.Triangle’s S****y Adventure 5
Author: RedMaverickZero


A persistent virus that infects time and space in the Creator’s computer, he continuously attacks Mr.Triangle until one of them stands and the other falls. Consequently, Mr.Triangle thinks he sucks.

In OHR House: Heroes, he comes to the real world in solid form to cause terror in the house and wreak havoc in the digital realm, but he does so with a nasty lisp. Some villains, meanwhile, question his sexual orientation, as if a villainous serpent should have a preference. He doesn’t really get along with them much.


Name: Dr. Mu
Game(s): Walthros, Super Walrus House, Village People: The Video Game
Author: Paul Harrington


A scientific madman who loves dinosaurs and diabolical schemes, he first arrived on the scene when he captured the Walthrosian super group Dinosaur Triple on Dinosaur Island. Ever since then, he has relocated his lab, practiced on new robotic experiments, dressed like an S&M party dancer, and eventually raided the sewers of San Francisco to begin a new diabolical plot, this time against the Village People. He is truly the everyman’s mad scientist, and he puts no filter on decency.

In OHR House: Heroes, as the face of true, hideous evil, Dr. Mu is the mastermind of the villains’ operation, the supplier of all its tricks, and the egomaniac who wants attention all to himself. He’s also paranoid, obsessive-compulsive, and his love for dinosaurs eventually causes problems for everyone.


Name: Joe
Game: Arfenhouse 3
Author: Misteroo


Arfenhouse stands in a world of chaos. People talk like trash, the landscape looks like a five-year-old’s refrigerator drawings, and strange Pokémon curse under their unintelligible-speaking, nonsensical tongues. Joe is the outsider who’s stuck in this world, and he’s the only normal-looking, normal-speaking creature around. And, he hates being a part of it. His straight-man persona is a deep contrast to Housemaster’s insanity.

In OHR House: Heroes, he somehow gets lumped into the villains’ group, even though he’s not really a villain. The forever odd-fit, it seems that Joe will never pair with people he would consider fair kinsmen.

“JOES HERE!”


The Supporting Players:

Some are heroes. Some are critters. Each of them plays a significant role to the story, but none are subjected to votes. They guide the nine through difficulties. They encourage and annoy them. These are the people that fuel the fire under the heroes’ feet, and the ones that make the heroes’ journey possible.

Name: Powerstick Man
Game: The Adventures of Powerstick Man
Author: Pepsi Ranger



Back in a time when RPGs were mostly serious, or tried to be, and the joke game had hardly been touched, one man donned a pair of tights and attempted to bring parody to the masses. He moved about in a vast world, picking on elements of pop culture, and forwent the archetype of knights and dragons to introduce to the OHR superheroes with sarcasm issues and villains who had troll-like armpit hair. He was a commentator on life and a lover of commercialism. And he was named after deodorant.

They called him Powerstick Man.

In OHR House: Heroes, this superhero with the blond mullet loses the hero card to play the announcer. Similar to his creator’s role in another OHR House series, unsurprisingly unfolding at the same time, he gathers the house mates together twice a week to issue challenges and kick the booted out the house. And, much to everyone’s dismay, he loves cracking a bad joke. Especially at inappropriate times.


Name: The Plip
Game(s): Wandering Hamster, Plip Tamer
Author: James Paige


Everyone knows the plip. It’s a slime-based creature that lives in the town of Flanat and pesters Bob the Hamster at every turn. It’s a cuddly thing that occasionally gives a nasty bite when encountered in the wild. Under most circumstances, it is not friendly.

In OHR House: Heroes, however, the plip is not only friendly, but makes itself into Bob Surlaw’s house pet. It acts like a dog, hanging out with Surlaw whenever he watches TV, but getting rowdy whenever situations get sticky in the house. It loves TV as much as Surlaw does. As of this moment, everyone owes it a favor (especially Bob Surlaw), since it seems to be the only member of the house that can get out of danger on its own.


Name: Super Walrus Man
Game(s): Walthros, Walthrus: Return of the Crystals, Super Walrus Chef, etc.
Author: Paul Harrington


The critter that once began as a brash, but heroic walrus in the battle for Walthros, had since transformed into a depressive, a homicidal maniac, and most recently, a chef. Generally opinionated, he is the backbone of Walthros’s spark, and ignites pretty much anything he touches (metaphorically, of course). Lately, he’s had his eye on materialism.

In OHR House: Heroes, he brings his cool, do-what-you-want attitude to the heroes’ doorstep when he helps his buddy Salom organize a battalion against the castle of villains. And while he has some decent skills as a lieutenant and fighter, he is mostly along for the ride, and the street cred.


Name: Salom Lancoven
Game(s): Walthros, Walthrus: Return of the Crystals, and so on...
Author: Paul Harrington


A true gentleman, akin to the knights of old, this Walthrosian seal can flap his wings and spring high into the air, then crash down on an enemy with grace and a lance. He is a devout soldier, a hero, and the seal you don’t mess with when you want to pick a fight. He’s a good friend to Bob Surlaw, and an asset to his quest.

In OHR House: Heroes, he brings his stalwart ways to the battlefield when he organizes the battle parties and pits heroes against villains. And he does it all cool like.


Name: RedMaverickZero
Game(s): OHR House 2: Hawaii, OHR House Heroes
Author: His Parents


Doubling as the Creator in all the Mr.Triangle games, RMZ is the author of the Mr.Triangle series, AXLE RPG, the Halloween Quest games, and a collection of contest entries that are too many to name here. He is also the man behind OHR House: Heroes. Considered one of the most prolific authors of the OHR community, his library of games takes a nice bite out of Castle Paradox’s game list. He was also once made into a towel in another OHR House game.

In OHR House: Heroes, he steps in as a coordinator and financier of the show, organizing the bureaucratic side of keeping the house intact. Every so often he’ll make an appearance to tell Powerstick Man what he’s doing wrong, or to remind house mates that they’re still in a show, despite the fact that they’re stranded on a farm where crazed pilgrims want to kill them, and therefore, still need to perform their tricks for viewers and vote each other off.


Cameos:

Every once in a while, some random hero or villain from the OHR universe will drop in on our heroes to cause a little trouble or to lend a little hand. While half the fun of the show is to see who will appear next, here’s a sampling of the characters you may find along the way.


Special Effects:

Now, I confess that I was a little misleading earlier. I had stated that the characters are what separate this show from others of its type. That, obviously, implies that the characters are what give the show its charm, and ultimately, its appeal. However, as Hollywood has taught us, the characters and story are cannon fodder compared to the true star of this game: the special effects.

And now I think we should spend a moment reviewing this backseat gem.


To clarify, the special effects segment of this review will include all elements of structure, including graphics, sound, animation, etc. There aren’t many explosions to critique.


So, let’s start with what everyone cares about most, the thing that gives the game its life, its appeal. Yes, we are talking about its graphics.

OHR House: Heroes showcases RMZ’s unique interpretation of heroes that we’ve spent over a decade coming to know. If anyone has played the Halloween Quest games, he or she will know his style right off the bat. It’s that comic charm, or that old ‘80s Saturday morning cartoon feel that says, “I’m innocent, but you better not mess with me.” There’s nothing anime about it. Though the characters have big heads—RMZ’s way of showing expression—they don’t have big eyes and small mouths. They look, for lack of a better term, normal. But with big heads.

For example, the character we all know and love as Bob the Hamster loses his anamorphically dwarfed body, originally designed by James Paige, for something a little fuller and fitting to RMZ’s style. And though Bob originally began life with a big head, RMZ was kind enough to give him a body that can support that head. Housemaster, known universally as a giant piece of wandering toast, was once only a head. Now he actually has a body (and a striped shirt). This style persists throughout all of RMZ’s interpretations of old heroes, and, in some cases, as the transformation of Housemaster can attest to, the differences are staggering.


Set design is a step above minimal around the house, but highly detailed in those areas where the heroes are traveling.

In the house, televisions, while frozen with the same image of Mr.Triangle tramping through the Mushroom Kingdom week after week, stand where they’re supposed to (directly across from the couch). The pool, while mostly uninteresting, has lawn chairs surrounding it. The kitchen has plenty of places for the heroes to eat, and even provides Bob Surlaw a range of appliances for him to cook with. Examples like this can be found throughout the house, and they prove that while no stage needs extensive design, every stage needs something to define it whether it has a map name or not.


Of course, RMZ doesn’t stop there. Later in the show, the house takes a drastic turn, and before you know it the normal looking living room we had spent weeks getting to know takes on two different forms, both in the real world and in the digital. And, each form is believable. If this were a newbie game, I’d expect crude shapes and a bunch of solid color blocks to define the alternative forms, if the author would even bother with the extra plot point. For a game of quality, however, I expect pulled stops, and the house itself is just a springboard to that testament.

When we leave the house, the detail piles on from there. Airships are formed with wooden floors. Rivers flow beneath snowy bridges. And complex piping climbs the ledges throughout the castle interior. Again, no important detail is held back. This is what OHR Movie set design should look like.


Animation and sound effects are also a treat to watch (and hear), as RMZ carefully choreographed the action sequences to allow heroes to move, flap their arms, shoot things, wield swords, and so on in sync to the current situation’s demands, and did so with high quality sounds that one might get from Soundsnap.

This, I feel, is important, not only to the game but to games in general, because a.) it increases the authenticity of the presentation when the viewer can watch fluid actions onscreen and hear realistic sounds, thus enhancing the experience, and b.) it reveals how important the cliché “show, don’t tell” really is to a production. As much as I hate to read in books and articles about how “amateurs,” “novices,” and “newbies” do things a certain way (i.e. badly), I think I need to bite the bullet and join the ranks of such critics: Newbie games have a habit of telling, not showing; and games like OHR House: Heroes proves just how much the viewer or player can lose when a game’s designer skimps on the details. Quality matters. It really does. While I think it’s okay to have armies of NPCs moshing in a field to simulate a battle in most games, I think it’s better to have those NPCs clashing swords, diving off cliffs (headfirst with lances pointed to the crowd), and splattering blood all over the place. While OHR House: Heroes carries a PG13 spirit, it maximizes that spirit with slime fights, animated duels, and even the best voiceover work done on the OHR so far (thanks mostly in part to Vampiducki’s stellar performance as Vlad the Hamster, which, in my opinion, could rival the voices found in a Disney animated film; though, I think RMZ himself needs to practice emoting character into his voiceover work, as his turn as Mr.Triangle would’ve worked better as Kyle than as the grumpy shape he was speaking for).

Nothing that RMZ did here was hard, folks. It just takes a little extra time to get it right. If you like your game, you’ll make it good. If you love your game, you’ll make it great. If you hate your game, it’ll look like 90 percent of the game list. Don’t start a game unless you’re gonna enjoy it.


Moving on...

The music is both a copout and a tribute, as it borrows the score from its inspiration, OHR House. While the copout prevents the soundtrack from having true originality (which would be impossible anyway, as every track is ripped), it does offer the viewer some familiarity with the structure, and for that I think it’s placed appropriately. The differences, of course, are in special circumstances where the sequence may mimic some memorable moment in pop culture, like having the heroes blast enemies with slime to the tune of Ray Parker Jr.’s theme song for the Ghostbusters. But beyond that, one can expect to hear the same tune for the first day of the week as he can for the recaps on the OHR House series.


And then we have the game’s structure. This, I think, is the true heir apparent to OHR House, and the one thing that really doesn’t need a change.

When one loads OHR House: Heroes, he or she is given a DVD menu screen. From here, he can select the number of the week that he wants to watch, or pick a special feature (which we’ll discuss in Part 2), and then let the game do the rest.

Assuming that he picks an episode (1-8), he will then be whisked away to the first day of that week, where the movie will begin to play. This is where the conflicts arise, competitions are issued, and the action unfolds.

This is also where we are faced with “Talking Heads,” those breaks in the action where a character will speak directly to the camera about whatever he or she thinks of the current situation. This is a staple of all reality shows, a big part of OHR House, and now it’s a big part of OHR House: Heroes. This gives the viewer a unique insight to a character’s thoughts (something that most games don’t bother with), and adds an extra level of immersion into the story. The only annoyance I’ve had with this system is that every character has the same scrambled blue background for his interview room as the next, which even OHR House managed to avoid. I’d have rather seen backgrounds of the pool, the living room, the snowfield, etc., spring up from time to time, depending on where the interview happened. If the blue background was an “interview room,” I could understand using it consecutively throughout the in-house sequences. But it really didn’t make sense using it for the later episodes when the heroes weren’t anywhere near the house. But if that’s my only complaint about the entire show—well, this and the persistent typos that RMZ never fixed—then the show really has something special going for it.


Finally, I know I said I wouldn’t discuss the plot earlier in this review, but I do think I should at least talk briefly about the success of the story. While this show and OHR House 3: On the Plantation were still in production, I had started the fifth Epic Marathon, which focused exclusively on episodic games and movies. OHR House: Heroes beat OHR House 3 by a slim margin, as both were so well done that to single either of them out as better would’ve been like freeze-framing an auto race to see which of two stock cars got its nose past the finish line first. However, while OHR House 3 was the veteran entry with the stranger characters and the better dialogue, I think there’s a reason why OHR House: Heroes took the lead. One, I think RMZ did a better job with the bonus content. But also, RMZ did something with the story that no other reality show ever attempts. He put the heroes in their elements. He brought a rampaging evil to their doorstep and forced the heroes to do something about it. Yes, it involved driving them out of home. Yes, it threatened the course of the show itself. But he went with it. He made an action story out of it. Most reality shows focus on the neuroses of its house mates, attempting to pigeonhole their clashing personalities to whatever task or situation fits the paradigm of the show, regardless of their skills. While that offers great conflict, it often sacrifices the popcorn-fueled adrenaline that we sometimes need. To OHR House’s credit, it did shake the foundation a bit when it introduced a murder mystery at the end of the second season (in Hawaii), and later evicted its house mates, similar to what happens in OHR House: Heroes, near the end of the third season. But at the end of the day, it’s still about clashing neuroses in an environment that challenges their personalities and doesn’t really offer anything different. It still forces everyone to fight each other in a game of wits for the prize—a nice guy’s gladiator arena—and it’s like any reality show we’ve seen before—excellently written, but familiar. I think OHR House: Heroes was slightly more successful because it went against the grain.


Conclusion:

It took a long time to get here, but my verdict is this: OHR House: Heroes is complete, it’s well designed, and due to my overall lack of criticism, I think it’s worth the three or four hours it takes to watch it. If you haven’t done so already, give it a download, grab a plate of nachos, and spend an afternoon playing catch-up with the rest of the community. It’s a fun show. And, you don’t even have to wait months for the next episode like the rest of us had to do when RMZ was still making it.

Next month, I’ll review the bonus features, and then we can really have fun. I’ll also have a companion episode guide to help you recap whatever you may have missed. Stay tuned.